As Project Managers, we get the ‘pleasure’ of working with people of every variety. Not only are we expected to work alongside everyone else involved with the project, but we’re also expected to help them, answer questions and provide direction. Simple enough, right? Well, on paper it is. Management gets difficult when personalities begin to clash. Maybe a teammate thinks you’re stupid and doesn’t want to listen to you. Perhaps they think you’re too smart and are threatened by you. Even more vague – they might just not like you for their own reasons. While this seems like a big deal when it’s happening to us, it’s statistically inevitable – no one can please everyone. Manage enough people over time and you’ll run into difficulty with some. Managing arrogant, condescending co-workers isn’t easy, but it’s doable! Today, we’re taking about managing jerks as a Project Manager, along with which behavior we should act on vs. let slide. Let’s get into it!
How To Manage Arrogant & Condescending Coworkers: Table Of Contents
Jump ahead to a specific section by clicking below!
- What Type Of Person Is Considered A Jerk At Work?
- Standing Your Ground
- Calling Out Bad Behavior, Documentation, Mindset & More
- Be Flexible
- Being Fair, Asking Questions & More
What Type Of Person Is Considered A Jerk At Work?
It can be difficult to classify what makes a person a jerk. If someone blatantly states something rude or inappropriate, they make their true colors obvious. What about when its’ more subtle?
For the sake of this article, we’ll classify the frustrating, arrogant or condescending behavior below as signs of a jerk:
- Rude, Unprofessional Conduct
- Disagreeing Or Challenging Ideas In A Non-Constructive Way
- Putting Down Others’ Work
- Overly Confrontational Or Argumentative Behavior
- Not Taking Directions & Deadlines Seriously
- Spreading Gossip & Talking Negatively Behind Others’ Back
- Being Overly Stubborn
- Won’t Admit Fault Or Take Responsibility
The list can go on and on, but you get the idea.
Managing Jerks As A Project Manager: Standing Ground
As Project Managers, we carry a large load of responsibility on our shoulders. This responsibility includes maintaining enough harmony between team mates to get the project done right.
That said, there are instances when Project Managers must hold their ground, lay down the law and put these “jerks” in their place. By not doing so, we run the risk of others taking the project requirements and our leadership less seriously going forward.
When it comes to managing jerks as a Project Manager, keep these tips in mind:
- A Blatant Lack Of Professionalism Must Be Called Out In The Moment. Everyone sees these situations the same – the jerk has pushed a boundary…will they get away with it? You must ensure that inappropriate behavior is nipped in the bud.
- Official Written Warnings May Be Required. If your gut tells you that a serious warning is in order, do’t be afraid to issue an official reprimand. This includes letting the HR dept. know of what’s happened. This ideally happens after you’ve spoken to this person about the problem and have worked out a solution. Document both.
- Make Sure Everyone Has A Chance To Be Heard. If a coworker or teammate is making others uncomfortable to fully engage, you must emphasize the importance of teamwork and give others the attention they need. Everyone has something to offer.
- Hold Your Ground When Giving Instructions Or When Challenged. If you literally need to say “I’m the boss here and I am not arguing or debating – this is what I’m telling you to do”, while giving instructions, then do so. When challenged, it’s important not to have a holier-than-thou attitude, but we must not fold immediately when someone challenges our opinion. State your reasons and listen to others’.
- Stay Calm & Level-Headed. One of the quickest ways to lose credibility as a leader is to get emotional. This includes anger, frustration, ego flares, insecurity and many other negative emotions.
- If All Else Fails, Terminate This Person (From The Project Team). If this person can’t maintain a reasonable working relationship and baseline level of professionalism, out the door they go! Vet this properly through the appropriate channels, though ie. your boss, HR department, etc.
- Be The Opposite Of The Jerk. Negative people have a way to bringing other people down with them. In these times, your other teammates need a positive beacon to look to; someone who can counteract the gossip and negativity. Matching the jerk’s negativity tit-for-tat will unfortunately make you both look bad in the eyes of others.
These are just a few ways we can maintain the tone of the project and our own reputations while being tactful.
Related Articles:
- How To Not Get Bullied At Work: Essential Tactics
- How To Stop Being Too Nice At Work: 12 Simple, Quick Techniques
- Managing Egos At Work: How To Decipher The Hidden Messages
Managing Jerks As A Project Manager: Being Flexible
We can talk all day about staying tough and stoic throughout when managing jerks, but the project still must get done…and we still need to work with this person.
In turn, we must make sure we don’t go too overboard – we need to keep our own tempers in check and give these jerks some room to be constructive.
- Let Them Shine. If you’re managing a jerk, it’s important to get the most out of them. This person must have some redeemable qualities – it’s better to have them working at their best than the alternative. BONUS TIP: Praise them….only when warranted!
- Ask Questions. If a person is disagreeing with your position or direction, ask them what they’d do instead. If they’re going to make bold statements, they’re going to back them up. Keep asking more questions as they elaborate. Best case, they at least contribute something useful. If you’re in the right and they’re just being a jerk, your questions will put them back on their heels and their answers will do all the talking – and everyone else will take note.
- Be Fair. Give people the time and resources they need to get work done, but also establish steps and timeframes. Enforcing these agreed-upon timeframes and terms is completely fair game, no matter what the jerk says. If you’re fair, their efforts to be petty will look even worse.
- Don’t Take It Personally. When managing jerks, our own egos often flare up. This makes us less motivated to work with them constructively and more motivated to one-up them. At the end of the day, it’s just work. They’re just a coworker. It’s not that big of a deal.
Related Articles:
- What Are The Signs Of A Toxic Work Environment? Our Top 10
- Why Is Emotional Intelligence Important In Project Management?
- Importance Of Negotiation In Project Management, With Examples
In Closing…
While working with a jerk, we can feel like we’re going crazy. Managing jerks as a Project Manager is no picnic, but we ALL get put into this situation eventually. By following the tips discussed in this article and keeping your cool, you’ll barely notice them! Thanks a lot for reading.
